Hi, my name is Jen and I am a judger. (I am in recovery...but judging is a disease and I know that I need to take one day at a time.) Having kids was a major "point of awareness" for me. All of a sudden I was faced with the knowledge that I am a very judging person. Most of my sentences began with "I'd never" or "I'll never". Example: "I'd never drive a mini-van"..."I'd never let my kids eat fast food"..."OK, I'd never let my kids eat McDonald's."..."OK, I'll never let my kids eat french fries"..."OK, my kids will only be allowed to eat at McDonald's once a week."
Then I had a boy. I used to look at unruly/active boys and marvel at the parent's lack of parenting skills. Then God gave us Kai. We are very confident and consistent parents (I may not always be fun, but always consistent and loving. I am working on being more fun.) Kai is a button-pusher, a rule breaker, an unruly sometimes, active always boy. Around the time that Kai turned 3, I decided I would no longer judge a parent's parenting skills by looking at the behavior of their children.
Then, I dropped all of my 60 plus lbs that I gained with Kai and more in 2 years...so I wondered why did it take women so long to lose their baby weight?? Right now I am still thinner than I was when I got married but I have been on a weight plateau for 3 years. (No more judging about losing weight!)
I have so many examples about how I used to judge...about clothes, (I'll never look like a dumpy mom around my husband) kids, (I'd never let my kids go to public school) cars, (i'd never buy a brand new car, how stupid.) life choices, (I can't believe her child is already into Starbucks...I can't believe her kid is in Kindergarten and they let them watch Star Wars!) (My house would NEVER look that messy...)(why don't they have more furniture? I would never buy a home that I couldn't furnish just like the showroom the minute I moved in!) The list goes on and on!
Honestly, I had NO IDEA that I had areas of judgement when it comes to camping....
UNTIL...
The Cabelas camping kitchen arrived on my doorstep.
Alex unpacked it from the box and it has a beautiful black carrying case with "Cabelas" embroidered in gold on the side.... I set it up (it took me 12 minutes the first time) and it is something to behold...
I stood back (so excited, it is perfect and exactly what I'd hoped for!) and all of a sudden realized...we are now that family. (point of judgement awareness!) You know the family I am talking about. You may have camped next to them....while you have an old trunk that serves as your camping kitchen, a canvas tent that leaks when it rains and stuff sacks filled with mismatched sleeping bags, all of their gear is matching inscribed with "Cabelas" or "REI" (even their clothes!).
You are cooking on your coleman stove on the picnic bench and they have THE CABELAS CAMPING KITCHEN blocking your view of the lake. (It is a lot bigger in person than it looked on the website!)
This is where I would have in the past rationalized my purchase...I am not going to. Good to know that God is still revealing areas that I need to change (and not judge).
So I am going to set up my camp kitchen (hide the embroidered bag) and enjoy. I do promise to not block the view of the lake though!
I can't wait!
3 comments:
I am so excited to see your "camping kitchen"! Rob says if it is as great as it looks maybe we can get one for next year! See you very soon
We all judge in one way or another. Your blessing, like you said, is that you're recognizing it. I think it's one of the greatest challenges in life...to not judge. I often wonder why it comes so easy. I look at my beautiful son and he does not judge. If someone is smiling at him, he'll smile. He doesn't care if they are rich or poor, young or old or if they have tubs for their camping kitchen or a macked out Cabella's kitchen!
I am going to try to not teach him to judge. I know I would never sit him down and 'teach' him, but I hope to not teach him in the words I use to talk to or about people. Especially when I'm in traffic!
Great post! Can't wait to see your kitchen!
Good job Jennifer...but, it you hide your Cabela bag, you take away another opportunity for someone else to grow and learn the lessons you are learning. Just don't block the lake view.
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